What Your Super Mario Party Character Says About You

ario Party: Whether you love it or hate it, you’ve definitely been pulled into a game at some point. I finally had the chance to sit down with Cam to play some Super Mario Party and it got me thinking about all the different friends and people that have stolen my Stars and beat me at mini-games over the years. Here’s what I can definitively say about your personality based on who you play in Super Mario Party!

 

MARIO
You’re probably nine years old or younger. If you aren’t, you definitely play Mario Party single-player because your friends make fun of you. Your favorite book is probably something you read in high school English because you don’t like reading.

LUIGI
You win Mario Party three times out of four. You are the youngest sibling in your family. You enjoy laughing at people that lose. You will steal coins and Stars from your friend in a two-player game. Low key argues on GameFAQs.

PEACH
You’re a man…or a mom.

 

 

DAISY
Someone beat you to playing Peach.

 

 

WARIO
You stream on Twitch to 10 people. You are most likely to order pizza for yourself and share with no one. Despite this, you probably care the least about winning at Mario Party, but probably still won the Coin Star.

WALUIGI
You think you’re really funny because you enjoy “meme culture”. There is a 100% chance that you will share this article or leave a comment saying “accurate”. You are still bitter that Waluigi is not in Smash but almost exclusively for the attention. You ask for breadsticks when a Wario player orders pizza.

YOSHI
You are a bitter 20-something man who thinks video games have artistic merit. You are probably someone who either speedruns or 100% games. You have to play Mario Party at a friend’s house because you haven’t owned a Nintendo console since the GameCube. If you are none of these things, you are someone’s girlfriend.

DONKEY KONG
You’ve given up on taking anything seriously. You almost never get Stars, but will win because you won every bonus star. You are the person most likely to scream in excitement or agony at the game. You consume cake and/or alcohol as a meal.

ROSALINA
Everyone is glad that you were able to make it to hang out, for once. You enjoy wearing nice clothes just because. You have a job where you can buy other game consoles, but you buy exclusively Nintendo products. You probably live alone.

BOWSER
You’re 11 years old, you’re at a birthday party, and you wanted to play as the bad guy. You like to go on 9Gag. You spend your allowance on plastic. You probably hit people when you lose.

BOWSER JR.
You also play as Bowser Jr. in Smash. You keep expecting people to be surprised that you picked Bowser Jr., but nobody cares. Your dream is going to Nintendo World. You’ve never taken an amiibo out of its box and you’ve never beaten Super Mario Sunshine.

GOOMBA
You’re a super quirky cool cat kid who wants to live on the wild side tonight!!!

 

BOO
You like Apple products. You let people talk over you. You have the worst laugh, but one of the better personalities of your friends. You haven’t played a Mario game since you were 13 but your friends really wanted to play.

KOOPA
I don’t know. You’re probably a 4-year old sibling of the person who owns the Switch. You’ll give up in 20 minutes.

 

HAMMER BRO
You enjoy going out for coffee for the aesthetic, but you also like Frappes. When something new pops up in the game, you have to comment on it. Nobody knows how you’re getting good grades and it’s insufferable. Your favorite food is Mac and Cheese (or some comparable pasta).

SHY GUY
You make up words because you don’t know how to communicate feelings to others. You think it’s cool to like Rick and Morty. Did you really bring a granola bar in case you got hungry?

POM POM
You’re a computer  player.

MONTY MOLE
This is your fifth round of Mario Party in a row and you’ve run out of characters to choose. You own stuffed animals. You don’t understand math or taxes, because you’re either too young or never really got good at either. You want it to snow all year then want sun when it’s here for more than two weeks.

DRY BONES
Congratulations on being a special guest on the Wario player’s Twitch stream! You use your hobbies as substitute for personality, but are still the most likable player. You have trouble saying no to people. If you’re young, you are the target of the Bowser player’s punches.

DIDDY KONG
You’re in this game?!

 

 

 

Now that I’ve correctly guessed your personality, you should check out Cam’s review of Super Mario Party! Or, if you’re looking for a lengthier read, take a look at my essay Name Everyone. ♦

ario Party: Whether you love it or hate it, you’ve definitely been pulled into a game at some point. I finally had the chance to sit down with Cam to play some Super Mario Party and it got me thinking about all the different friends and people that have stolen my Stars and beat me at mini-games over the years. Here’s what I can definitively say about your personality based on who you play in Super Mario Party!


MARIO

You’re probably nine years old or younger. If you aren’t, you definitely play Mario Party single-player because your friends make fun of you. Your favorite book is probably something you read in high school English because you don’t like reading.


LUIGI

You win Mario Party three times out of four. You are the youngest sibling in your family. You enjoy laughing at people that lose. You will steal coins and Stars from your friend in a two-player game. Low key argues on GameFAQs.


PEACH

You’re a man…or a mom.


DAISY

Someone beat you to playing Peach.


WARIO

You stream on Twitch to 10 people. You are most likely to order pizza for yourself and share with no one. Despite this, you probably care the least about winning at Mario Party, but probably still won the Coin Star.


WALUIGI

You think you’re really funny because you enjoy “meme culture”. There is a 100% chance that you will share this article or leave a comment saying “accurate”. You are still bitter that Waluigi is not in Smash but almost exclusively for the attention. You ask for breadsticks when a Wario player orders pizza.


YOSHI

You are a bitter 20-something man who thinks video games have artistic merit. You are probably someone who either speedruns or 100% games. You have to play Mario Party at a friend’s house because you haven’t owned a Nintendo console since the GameCube. If you are none of these things, you are someone’s girlfriend.

DONKEY KONG

You’ve given up on taking anything seriously. You almost never get Stars, but will win because you won every bonus star. You are the person most likely to scream in excitement or agony at the game. You consume cake and/or alcohol as a meal.

ROSALINA

Everyone is glad that you were able to make it to hang out, for once. You enjoy wearing nice clothes just because. You have a job where you can buy other game consoles, but you buy exclusively Nintendo products. You probably live alone.

BOWSER

You’re 11 years old, you’re at a birthday party, and you wanted to play as the bad guy. You like to go on 9Gag. You spend your allowance on plastic. You probably hit people when you lose.

BOWSER JR.

You also play as Bowser Jr. in Smash. You keep expecting people to be surprised that you picked Bowser Jr., but nobody cares. Your dream is going to Nintendo World. You’ve never taken an amiibo out of its box and you’ve never beaten Super Mario Sunshine.

GOOMBA

You’re a super quirky cool cat kid who wants to live on the wild side tonight!!!

BOO

You like Apple products. You let people talk over you. You have the worst laugh, but one of the better personalities of your friends. You haven’t played a Mario game since you were 13 but your friends really wanted to play.

KOOPA

I don’t know. You’re probably a 4-year old sibling of the person who owns the Switch. You’ll give up in 20 minutes.


HAMMER BRO

You enjoy going out for coffee for the aesthetic, but you also like Frappes. When something new pops up in the game, you have to comment on it. Nobody knows how you’re getting good grades and it’s insufferable. Your favorite food is Mac and Cheese (or some comparable pasta).

SHY GUY

You make up words because you don’t know how to communicate feelings to others. You think it’s cool to like Rick and Morty. Did you really bring a granola bar in case you got hungry?

POM POM

You’re a computer  player.

MONTY MOLE

This is your fifth round of Mario Party in a row and you’ve run out of characters to choose. You own stuffed animals. You don’t understand math or taxes, because you’re either too young or never really got good at either. You want it to snow all year then want sun when it’s here for more than two weeks.

DRY BONES

Congratulations on being a special guest on the Wario player’s Twitch stream! You use your hobbies as substitute for personality, but are still the most likable player. You have trouble saying no to people. If you’re young, you are the target of the Bowser player’s punches.

DIDDY KONG

You’re in this game?!

Now that I’ve correctly guessed your personality, you should check out Cam’s review of Super Mario Party! Or, if you’re looking for a lengthier read, take a look at my essay Name Everyone. ♦

 

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